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Zofia and Jozef Stoch Looking Back a keepsake from Memoir for Me memoirforme com

This book holds all the amazing stories that my parents have told me throughout the years I am grateful for all they have done and for all the sacrifices they have made to make sure we have the best life possible We have so much to be grateful for and it s thanks to all these amazing memories Love Edyta

Zofia s parents Marysia Andrzej Kunc 1938 Zofia Kunc Stoch b 1941 Zofia n e Kunc Stoch was born on May 20 1941 in Zakopane Poland near the southern border with Slowakia Zofia s father Andrzej was born in Zakopane but her mother Marysia n e Lis was from Orava which is closer to Slovakia My mom came to Zakopane when she was 18 Her dad had died and she was looking for a job to be independent She worked for a hotel in housekeeping My father s sister worked there That s how Marysia met Andrzej They married young Marysia was only 19 and Andrzej was 22 and settled into a house on ul Tarary 46A After Zofia was born in 1941 she was joined by 3 sisters Jasia b 1942 Dzidzia b 1951 and Isa b 1953 Zofia s childhood was heavily impacted by WWII Her parents were sympathizers with the German resistance called the partisans My father gave the partisans food Many of the partisans lived in the woods and in the mountains for safety and also to better position themselves to fight Zofia s father risked his life and put his whole family at risk by aiding the resistance 4

My mom she told me stories When I was 2 the German soldiers came to the house and asked him Do you help the partisans My father was holding me in his arms and denied it He was a father holding a little girl so they didn t kill him Zofia doesn t remember the above story but does remember a scary experience with Russian soldiers Near the end of the war the Russians had pushed out the German troops and occupied parts of Poland In 1947 they arrived in Zakopane I ll never forget the soldiers It was very scary The Russian soldiers had no regard for the local people of Zakopane They raped the women killed the men and stole things When they arrived on Zofia s doorstep her parents took off to hide in the nearby woods leaving Zofia only 5 at the time home alone with younger sister Jasia and their older cousin Stenia Thankfully no one was hurt They didn t touch us but they took clocks and shoes While the rest of Poland was destroyed by war Zakopane was left almost untouched because it was a popular vacation spot But hostile occupation left a different impact The Kunc family house on Tatary in Zakopane Poland 5

Marysia and her sister in law Zofia 1945 Zofia Mietek Dzidzia s husband and Andrziej 1971 People hiked and skied in the Tatry Mountains Some of the best skiers and ski jumpers in the world would live and practice there During the occupation the Gestapo locked up many of these athletes because they were not German Food was scarce but Zofia s mother was resourceful There was no store she couldn t go and buy food My mom had geese ducks and chickens and she would give them to a very nice German woman from a local hotel for flour and sugar This was criminal they could ve killed my mom for it But this German lady likes my mom so she exchanged That s why we re still alive It turns out a little sugar went a long way We got no candies and always wanted something sweet Mama would make some pyzy a steamed donut with apple or something like that My Aunt Anielka would give us some bread and put a little water and a sprinkle of sugar I love it While the kids were small Zofia s mother Marysia left her hotel job to work for herself My mom had a small business sewing country style clothes for local people Marysia traveled all over taking the train to the different towns settled in the valleys between Zakopane and Kracow Along the way she would buy fabric and make shawls and other popular clothing pieces 6

Andrzej didn t hold a job but helped his wife with her business Unfortunately money was always an issue when he was around My dad was a good father but he was a gambler He would take money from her Marysia had to get creative to hide away her hard earned cash One time she put the money in the basement a couple thousand to hide from him and a rat came and ate it She take it and go to bank and if bank could find a number then she got the money Another time her mother hid away a bag of 24K gold but Andrzej found it gambled the gold away and replaced it with a bag of stones Zofia said she loved her father but admits that he was not the best husband He was good to us but he was not very good for my mom Meanwhile Zofia was attending school but not always happy about it She had other interests I was always busy I go to ski I got boyfriend you know This is why I have no time to read books Zofia liked math and science but found literature a bore You always had to read stories One teacher she asked me Why you not reading this story and she made me nervous so I called her a name Zofia had a rebellious streak At 13 she took her little sister Dzidzia only 3 at the time on a 40 kilometer bike ride to her mother s hometown She didn t tell her parents and they were gone all day My mom and dad go crazy We got no phone no nothing Stanley Dzidzia and Andrziej 1968 Zofia 1971 7

Zofia middle at her cousin Frank Grela s far right bar in the Pilsen neighborhood of Chicago 1976 Zofia biked to a church to join a pilgrimage of people from all over praying to a statue of Mary But her good intentions were overshadowed by her parents panic not knowing where their 2 daughters had gone They returned safely that night her sister fast asleep but Zofia no doubt got an earful Following elementary school Zofia studied the culinary arts but did not finish because in 1959 she met someone very special to her Stanislaw Stanley Bukowski They met at the local ski club and were married quickly In 1960 they were blessed with a daughter Danuta The new family remained in Zakopane in close quarters Everyone lived together in the same house All my sisters lived there my parents everybody in one little house This time is my very happy life because we were all together Stanley was a contractor in Zakopane and started building a new house just for them My first husband was a very good man My father gave us the parcel of land to build on Meanwhile Zofia s mother Marysia was making plans as well She was tired of the financial stress of living with Andrzej a compulsive gambler and now alcoholic In 1969 Marysia left him and Poland for a new life in the United States 8

My dad didn t know It was a secret We knew but if he found out she was leaving him he would go to the police make problems He was no good for her at this time Marysia had an aunt in Chicago who sponsored her to come over With only a 3rd grade education and no English skills she managed to make a living for herself making and selling coral jewelry She set up on the south side near at 49th and Laflin She divorced Andrzej and married again this time not for love but for a green card In 1970 Zofia joined her Marysia convinced her daughter that she could make more money in the U S to send back home Stanley supported Zofia s decision My husband let me go He liked the idea of me making money Zofia found work at a cousin s tavern in the Pilsen neighborhood I not speak English but I could bartend and made money She enjoyed her time spending almost 4 years in Chicago working and sending money back home When she returned to Poland Zofia realized that she and Stanley had grown apart My husband was still living at my mom s still building our house In Poland it could take 10 years to build a house because you have to pay everything in cash Zofia left him the unfinished house knowing someday their daughter Danuta could inherit it She no longer had a home or husband but she had a lot of U S dollars So she bought a Fiat 1250 and then two more Wlodek Zofia Jozef Dzidzia Mietek and Danuta 1976

On their wedding day 1982 Zofia with daughter Edyta 1982 It was only 1 500 U S dollars for one car Using business savvy she turned around and sold the cars for profit Two cars I put in the newspaper That s when Joe comes with a girlfriend to come and buy a car This was Jozef Stoch Zofia told him that the Fiat that he was interested in was coming from Italy and would take a couple of weeks to arrive Jozef left without the car but returned quickly Jozef would come to the house buy some beer for my father and he s not coming with the girlfriend It turns out that Jozef had other plans He took Zofia on drives and they visited nearby Warsaw to meet his family Soon they were talking marriage but first they had to wait for Zofia s divorce to Stanley a Jehovah s Witness to finalize In Poland it was not easy to get divorced if you had kids The divorce came through in 1978 and in 1980 Zofia and Jozef were blessed with a baby girl who they named Edyta In 1982 they were married in a small civil wedding ceremony in Zakopane For the first year we lived in my mother s house Then we bought a house together in Zakopane on Tetmajera 22 Jozef worked as a taxi driver and also opened a boutique with his sister He was a hard worker but much like Zofia s father he liked to gamble One day he took a bicycle to go buy milk and he was gone 2 days He came back with a car 10 Jozef had bumped into a friend found horses to bet on and won big Zofia was understandably upset at the time but can laugh about it now Her memories of this time are good ones staying home to raise baby Edyta and still having time for travel

We went to Bulgaria and all over Europe on vacation Edyta always slept in the back of the car But soon Zofia had her sights on returning to the United States We had a good life in Poland but I missed my mom and sisters In 1985 with Jozef s blessing Zofia and Edyta made plans to move to Chicago Her mother Marysia now married to an American sponsored them to come over but Zofia was concerned her trip would be denied because she had overstayed her last visa It turns out having an adorable child that wanted to see her grandma in Chicago helped We were at the United States Embassy in Warsaw and Edyta 5 was playing in the office crawling under tables calling all the employees ciocia aunt Edyta was so cute that the lady agreed Yes you go to see Grandma Grandma Marysia had moved to the north side of Chicago and bought a three flat at 3133 North Linder Zofia s sister Dzidzia lived in the basement Marysia lived on the first floor and Zofia and Edyta lived on the second floor Zofia loved being close to family including her older daughter Danuta who lived nearby Zofia s husband Jozef joined them in 1986 and found a job working long hours as a mechanic Zofia worked nights with a cleaning service in downtown Chicago She picked up the English language quickly unlike Jozef The Stoch family Poland 1983 11

In Krakow 1983 Zofia with daughters Edyta and Danuta 1985 I learned English but he didn t he worked for Polish people so he felt he didn t need it In 1989 Jozef traded in the long mechanic hours to open a floor cleaning service with friends on the east coast and secured contracts with Kmarts and Zayre all over Massachusetts The family moved to Westfield Massachusetts in 1990 I liked it but I missed so much my family Jozef sold his share of the business and they returned to Chicago 3 years later They moved to Prospect Heights where Zofia s sister Isa lived Zofia found work with Zebra Technologies in Lincolnshire and stayed for several years until she retired in 2003 She has since enjoyed travel Florida Wisconsin Michigan Minnesota and time with family Family is so important We always like to be together Though her own house is much quieter now Zofia is often visiting others Sisters Isa is in Edison Park and Dzidzia is in Rockford Daughters Edyta lives in Jefferson Park and Danuta is in Mount Prospect Her mother Marysia lived into her 90s passing away in 2010 Through loss and all her life Zofia s Catholic faith has been a constant Everything was based around family and faith We would go to church every Sunday My grandma worked in the church and she lived 100 years 12

Becoming Babcia has also been a fulfilling part of her life Her daughter Danuta gave her two grandchilden much earlier with Alexandra Alex b 1986 and Anna b 1994 Edyta has two children Vincent b 2006 and Sofia b 2008 who have filled Zofia s days since she has retired When Edyta had Vincent I come every day here for 12 years I got a job Babcia loves to cook for them and they happily eat anything she makes especially homemade soups baked pasta with applesauce and cinnamon and even pasta with cold milk When I was a little girl my mom always made pasta with milk I love it Vincent and Sofia love my food they eat anything But her joy comes from much more than just cooking for them I m so happy I have younger grandchildren They keep me busy If you stay home you re always thinking when I going to die Maybe tomorrow You have nothing to do Zofia says this with a laugh something she enjoys doing They do make me laugh Sofia tries to teach me things when we play school When she s not at Edyta s house Zofia can be found at the Polish National Alliance and her church in Mount Prospect St Thomas Becket She also finds a sense of community in local establishments For the past 32 years she has gone to the same salon every Saturday for hours to get her hair done and socialize Jozef and Sofia 2014 With grandchildren Vincent and Alexandra 2008 13

Jozef Edyta Zofia and new son in law Rick on the night of Edyta s engagement 2004 She s had a long and full life but of all her accomplishments Zofia is most proud of her children They are very good kids and got a good education They both work very hard Daughters Danuta works for Motorola for 35 years and Edyta is a Realtor Zofia has no regrets My life is not so bad I like my life My husband always thinks about what he had before in Poland I always tell him if you re always thinking negative your energy is not too good And then you give that negative energy to me and I go crazy Zofia says that she learned a positive attitude from her mom She loved America She said Oh my God take me here In Poland she worked so hard Four kids a crazy husband but she kept it all together She s never asked for help With the gift of perspective she gives the following bit of advice We lived through war after war It s a little different now I tell my kids thank god you re healthy you have job you take care of your kids Family is the best thing in your life Give thanks for everything you ve got 14

Jozef Stoch b 1944 Jozef Stoch was born on March 30 1944 in Furmanowa a neighborhood of Zakopane Poland The town is located at the base of the Tatras Mountains on the Southern border with Slovakia I was born during the war so it was a very hard time All the cities and towns were pretty much destroyed People were very poor Jozef had two sisters and four brothers Staszek b 1930 Andziej b 1932 Marysia b 1941 Jacek and Agnieszka twins b 1942 and Stefan b 1948 Agnieszka was raised by their uncle who lived about a half hour away My dad s brother could not have kids At the time boys were more favorable than girls so my mom gave away the twin daughter to her brother in law His oldest brother Staszek finished engineering school and was a pilot for the army Jacek was an economics professor at a military university in Warsaw Twin sister Agnieszka also taught in Warsaw A lot of them were highly educated This was uncommon for the time Stefan remained in Zakopane converting the family house into a tourist destination Jozef s childhood home in Furmanowa

Ludwiga middle with sisters and uncle 1937 Stoch side Ludwiga is front right 1950s He built a bar and restaurant The view is stunning The house is on a trail that leads right into the mountains Jozef s other siblings did not fare as well living tough lives cut short Andziej fell into the wrong crowd and lost his life over a gambling bet Marysia worked in hospitality and stayed back to care for their aging parents but struggled with mental illness and ended her own life All the Stochs had a tough road growing up in Poland during the Communist takeover Jozef was about 10 when his family was divided If you didn t choose a side you struggled My older brothers went off to join the Army My dad left to work as a forest ranger in eastern Poland Land was being offered to anyone who would claim it and he wanted the whole family to go there My mother did not want to go so he left Jozef and his younger siblings stayed back with his mom Ludwiga in a little house at the foot of the mountain They raised cows horses sheep and other animals My mom took care of the household and all the animals In the winter we d live up in the mountains In the summer we would live in the valley herding sheep We made shearling coats and sheep cheese It was tough to make ends meet We all had rags for clothes We would herd sheep and gather berries to sell to tourists to make money to buy school supplies 17

But even at a young age Jozef was enterprising and preferred making money to school He and a friend made wooden walking sticks with carved designs and sold them to tourists I thought why would I go to school when I could make a living off this I would make two to three carvings and have 15 for candy all day I had no childhood I always had to make money But there was some fun As a boy he enjoyed skiing and ski jumping I loved skiing Everyone was on skis in Zakopane I wasn t a good athlete but in the end if you wanted to become good you had to train As Jozef grew older he had other interests I wanted to go to the bar His mother struggling under the weight of raising kids and managing the house turned to alcohol to cope Money went to more sheep and more vodka My mom became friends with her neighbor he always had vodka If mom was gone or drinking there was no food Despite this rough childhood Jozef has good memories of his mother My mom was very good to me When I was 16 she sold a piece of our land to buy me a motorcycle She was a strong and hard woman and very beautiful She refused to have electricity or any of the modern conveniences She lived to age 94 Jozef s memories of his father Michal are not as strong probably because he wasn t around for much of Jozef s life He worked as a deliveryman taking food and supplies on horseback to tourists and workers who stayed up in the mountain 18 Jozef ski jumping 1956 58

Jozef 1985 It was very dangerous work because the trails were narrow Despite the risk Jozef remembers going with dad on a few deliveries Whenever I wanted to take off from the house I would go with him If Mom was upset because I did something bad I went off with Dad One time they both ran into a surprise while delivering supplies It was spring and a grizzly bear just walked out in front of us preferring the paved road instead of traveling through snow The horses startled jumping up and down They escaped the encounter unharmed Life improved for Jozef as he grew older and used his resourcefulness to make his own good fortune When I was 17 years old I didn t want to go to school anymore so I enlisted in the Army with the help of my brother Staszek But I only enlisted for a couple of months then was discharged for poor conduct It was too strict for me I didn t want to follow the rules Jozef instead joined a friend in the Polish town of Kaliszu and completed three years of automotive training and then another three years studying technical and exploratory transportation engineering at a vocational school He knew his way around an engine 19

I was interested in cars from the time I was a little kid In Kaliszu there were big factories where they would build cars as well as tractors and other farming machines After years of studying and work Jozef went from student to teacher and trained other students hands on I became a Mistrz Master teacher which paid very well I didn t know anyone from Zakopane with this certification At the age of 26 Jozef returned to Zakopane which was becoming a thriving tourist city People from other Communist nations enjoyed going on holiday there and Jozef realized his skills bartering with them were more profitable than all of his engineering training and automotive skills Life was good I could buy any car that I wanted at that point so why would I sit there and fix them At the time it was illegal to have anything but Polish money Because of regulations you could get much more with an American dollar so Jozef found ways to barter for things using the stronger currency I bought low and sold high using American dollars and smuggled illegal goods like cigarettes and alcohol across the borders Jozef viewed his illicit dealings were a matter of survival You were either dirt poor you worked for the scandalous government or you were doing something illegal That s the only way you could get by 20 Jozef 1975

Jozef with brother Stefan 2005 The work was high reward but had its price I was running back from Czechoslovakia and jumped the fence and someone from border patrol shot me in the stomach I had to hide and leave Zakopane for a while Another risky business deal involved a trunk full of 10 000 smuggled watches and his brother Staszek an Army Major I had the bright idea to bring my brother to bypass all these border patrol checkpoints I told him that he had to wear his uniform hat everything He kept taking the hat off and I yelled to put it back on His brother was unaware of the illegal goods they were transporting The sedan sunk because the boxes were so heavy When Staszek asked what was in the trunk I told him it was tiles He got suspicious so I opened a box and showed him the watches And that was the end of it He took off He got out of the car and walked the rest of the way home He wouldn t be a part of it 21

Luckily Jozef made it back with the watches in tow While dodging police to make a decent living something more stable and fortuitous entered his life in 1974 he met his future wife Zofia She had also grown up in Zakopane but attended different schools Zofia had put an ad in the paper to sell a car and Jozef with his current girlfriend answered the ad We came to Zofia s house and I was shocked I was very impressed I remember it to this day She looked very nice At that point the car didn t matter Jozef returned to visit this time without the girlfriend and had nothing to say about buying a car That s how our love affair started Jozef and Zofia started building a life together They helped Zofia s sister open a store and sold Italian shoes purses and other fine leather goods It also served as a currency exchange I had contacts with all these industry people throughout Poland dealing leather goods and they all wanted American dollars because it was stronger They sold things cheaper to me because I had dollars Jozef put his bartering skills to good use selling goods to Zakopane tourists and trading currency making money on both ends of the deal Financial success allowed Jozef to buy a house for his family in Zakopane His thirties were the self described best years of his life he was making money doing what he loved and he also became a father Daughter Edyta arrived in 1980 I was drunk for a week celebrating I was so happy I bought Zofia a beautiful necklace Edyta had the best clothes and she marched around in the finest attire I was so proud of my family 22 Jozef and Zofia s wedding day 1982 With daughter Edyta 1980

Reunited in America 1987 In 1987 the family left Poland for life in the U S His wife Zofia had family there and had wanted to move for some time Jozef was not happy with the decision We had a good life in Zakopane We had everything There I would go to the best restaurant in town for breakfast Here in America I go to Burger King They settled in Chicago where Jozef found work as a mechanic In 1990 Jozef and his family moved to Massachusetts where he and a friend opened a cleaning business We had about 50 stores throughout New England A lot of my friends from Poland would come and work for me In 1993 Jozef sold the business to return to Chicago He traded in cleaning supplies for a new job behind the wheel of a semi I became interested in trucking because I wanted to see the United States and it was very lucrative I was making money supporting the family But I was not around I was always driving always on the move 23

Jozef has been on the move for most of his life Now his daughter Edyta is grown and has children of her own Jozef is still often on the road but makes sure to spend time at home with his grandchildren Vincent b 2006 and Sofia b 2008 I like being a grandfather I enjoyed playing with them when they were young That s all I have right now my grandkids Now they don t really need us anymore because they re older and more independent His grandkids will probably disagree Jozef has lived a life to be proud of both here in the U S and in Poland with many years ahead of him I m proud that I have a normal family I gave them a more stable life as opposed to the one I grew up with But you can t compare them It was a much different time and a much different situation Although his life smuggling goods evading the police and international life tells a different story Jozef is modest about his life experiences I m no star I m just an old guy who led a boring life But I m happy with my life and family I still drive a semi truck long distance and enjoy seeing the country Maybe one day I ll finally retire and stay home But Jozef Stoch isn t one to sit still in retirement Time will only tell what other adventures await but you can bet it will make a good story 24 Walking his daughter down the aisle 2005 With grandson Vincent 2007